Camp: private conversations

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Respond here for a private conversation with Red! All comment threads are screened.

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[She's been eating hella curry lately anyway so.

But hey, she opens the door for him this time.]

Thank you for the food you have been leaving me.

[diesifkilled]

[He's a little surprised that she does, honestly. Did the curry plan actually work???]

Uh, no problem. I hope it was okay.

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[She smiles a little.]

It's one of my favorite dishes.

[diesifkilled]

[He returns the smile a little uncertainly.]

I'm glad.

Curry aside, though... how've you been?

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I suspect I should be asking you that question right about now.

[diesifkilled]

...

[Well your boyfriend who is me kind of completely broke my spirit but other than that]

I'm not exactly happy about the new counselor.

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You could ask your question now, you know.

[diesifkilled]

...Oh, I already did. And I got an answer.

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Was the answer satisfactory?

[diesifkilled]

[Okay he has to laugh at that because oh wow Red you don't even know what fucking joke his life is. And that would... actually be the first time he's ever laughed in camp, though it's hardly what you'd call cheerful.]

It was... I don't know what I was expecting, really. But it was an answer.

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He seems to be good at that.

[Giving 'an answer', she means.]

...you don't have to accept his answer, you know. You and him are entirely different people. The things you have experienced here set you apart from him.

[diesifkilled]

Well, this was about something from the past. So it's something we have in common, even if everything else is different.

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But how that shapes you is up to you. You don't have to walk the same path he does.

[diesifkilled]

...I really don't think that's even a concern anymore. I'm never going to be a hero.

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Why not?

[diesifkilled]

Because... I can't save everyone. I can't save anyone. And the reason I wanted to in the first place was...

[He trails off, unable to put words to that truth.]

Anyway, considering all of that, there's no reason for me to ever become a heroic spirit. So I don't think I'll become him.

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That's fine, you know. You don't have to become him, you just have to be you.

[diesifkilled]

I guess? It's just going to take a while to figure that out, since I don't have much of a me to begin with.

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You could start here, you know.

...just because you can't save everyone doesn't mean you can't save anyone.

[diesifkilled]

That... would be nice, I think.

[He faces her with a smile that's a little more genuine.]

I'd like to save you if I can.

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[That...gets her to smile a little.]

If you can, that would be nice. I am quite stubborn, though. Nobody has convinced me to leave camp yet.

[diesifkilled]

That just means I have to put an end to this camp, right? Then you won't need to be here anymore.

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If you can end camp, that would get me to leave.

[diesifkilled]

Well, then. That means I know what I've got to do. And... that also means I've got to survive, doesn't it? Since it doesn't seem like the dead can actually do much from their side.

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The dead are gone, Shirou. 'People die if they are killed', remember?

So yes, you should do your best to stay alive.